I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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