winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
