dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
