i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
