I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
