I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Randomize
