two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
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