Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
