Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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