We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
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