Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
