i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Randomize