we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize