Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
