he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
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