Well apparently he's into motor boating.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
