I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
