After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
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