I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize