Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
