god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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