yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
People in love make me want to vomit
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I could fuck to npr.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize