how can u be prego again
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
