So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Randomize
