Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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