Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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