Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
