he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
