Only a mothe r could love this liver
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
