don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
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