so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Randomize
