it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Randomize
