Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
