How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
