I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
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