who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
