You just made me feel so damn special
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Randomize
