Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Randomize
