is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Randomize
