I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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