I wish I only lived at night.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Randomize
