jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
Randomize