all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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