any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
