Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
