...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize