is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Randomize
