i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Randomize
