Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
