I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
