pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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